How does it feel competing in Public Speaking Contests?

I am competitive by habit since young.  It is like playing a favourite board game with strong players. An addiction and an inclination especially if I have shown an aptitude for it.

Every year I look forward to the start of contest season at Toastmasters to experience the rush of adrenaline. There were some years I have prepared intensively and some years I only dreamt intensively of preparing. Preparation always helps.

My first contest was only a month after I joined as a Toastmaster in 2018. I was qualified only for the Table Topics (Impromptu speaking for 2 mins on any random topic) contest and since I was too new, I did not participate in the Evaluation speech contest. I remember even then an urge to win, a hope I could crack it despite being surrounded by seasoned Toastmasters. Needless to say, it was a fanciful wish. I didn’t even know how the judging happened or how many levels of the contest there were etc. There are three timer cards shown to every contestant so we remain within the time limit. Green at 1 min, Yellow at 1:30 mins and Red at 2 mins. One must end the speech by 2 mins 30 secs or stand to get disqualified. I was one of those people who waited desperately for the green card to show up as I would, often in the middle of the speech, get the feeling of having goofed up and wanting to quit to save face. I did not win in 2018. But I thought about 5 different ways I could have dealt with the topic and what went wrong with my nerves.

The next year, I enrolled again but this time with very little hope of winning. But strangely I won the Club level contest because of providence or destiny. I had to move to the Area level Contest to participate next and that only meant one thing - search for help- Was there a way or method to approach Table Topics. Thanks to the internet and its contributors, I scrounged through workshops,  analyzed winning Table Topics speeches for patterns of thinking and figured out what the judges look for. That year in Area Contest, I forgot about all the techniques I had fished out but remembered only one- start with a question (laughs) and keep going on. I came third. As I watched the other contesting speakers, I thought to myself- How are they able to do it so well? I realized I needed to try more topics rather than only read about them. And the pursuit has stayed with me to this day.

In the years - 2020, 2021, 2022,  I won at the Area level consecutively but failed at the Division level (Division is the next level after Area). I had worked quite hard for 2021 and 2022. How to calm myself, how to project my voice, how to show confidence, how to structure the speech, a lot of reading, vocabulary and recollecting quotes I enjoyed. It did make a difference but it also made me realise these patterns should be internalised.

This year was special, I came second in my Division level contest which is a level up. I don’t consider a Division win my measurement tool but I knew I improved more. Every year I have tried a little more and learnt a little more, not only about techniques but about how I operate. Everyone is unique, and my issues centre mainly around focus, flow and anxiety. This year I had sipped a glass of water before I took to the stage, I took deep breaths and smiled, the topic was read out - “The tone is the message”. I thought to myself- “oh, this is quite familiar and easy.” Tick tick 1, tick tick 2, tick tick 3 and my first idea was about IVR(Interactive Voice Response) machine-sounding phone calls we make. And I jumped straight in. I had a rocky start as I stuttered and scrambled for the right words that didn’t come at the right time but I had to move on and I did. I went to one of the workshops I had given on vocal variety and showed them how tone shapes our speech. Saw a few interested faces engrossed in my speech and that encouraged me further. I bounced to a few rhetorical questions and closed with a call to action- a familiar structure I was used to in my practices. I made sure I showed my vocal dexterity, my ability to establish eye contact and move the stage. As I saw the red card I rounded up and left. Yet again feeling it wasn’t my best.  My best ideas rushed inside me at the speed of light immediately after I left the stage (laughs). I could have used my workshop examples more. I could have used a few more seconds to think before I started. I could have emotionally connected with the audience more and made them agree with me. I need more contest simulated practice screamed the voices of that very harsh self-critic that resides within me.

As I sat down and watched the remaining speakers, I observed the vulnerabilities and strengths in every contestant. I saw even the most admired speakers (some are professionals) of mine were nervous. It was after all normal to feel the way I did I thought.

I have decided to be kind to myself this time and make amends and be more appreciative because on reflection I know how much I have persisted; I know how often I have chosen courage over fear and I know of all the collective efforts I have put into its pursuit through practice over the years. So here I go- “I am proud of you, Deepa! You are a winner.”

I know I will contest again, maybe not next year but I know I will be back. I will be back until I feel I have reached a place of feeling very comfortable and ready. And I know I will grow. It is a fascinating experience to watch my videos of the past years and witness the growth.

We lose to learn and contests are my accelerated learning curves. I personally advocate everyone to try contesting. After all, what is there to fear- You might win or you might lose. Either way, you only go on to learn more. It is a good addiction to have.

Attached video links to some contest speeches
https://youtu.be/a4yjuAJcLJE
https://youtu.be/vA6sp5GaiNc